Wellbeing is about feeling good in ourselves and our lives. Poor wellbeing can lead to poor mental health and vice versa.
When we take time for self-care, we resource ourselves better and can give more to others and get the most out of life.
There’s no magic wand, wellbeing can take a bit of work and awareness, no more so than when we’re busy and stressed.
Here’s a quick look at why unmanaged bussyness and stress can throw life out of balance and our expert tools to help.
The Exhaustion Funnel, illustrated above, represents what can happen when life gets busier and more stressful.
The top rung shows a balanced lifestyle. With unmanaged busyness and stress we move down the funnel and can experience a narrowing of our lives as we give up activities and behaviours that are useful in supporting our wellbeing.
With increased or persistent stress there can be a tendency to stop using helpful coping strategies and turn to unhelpful ones instead.
What's the first thing you stop doing when you get busy and stressed?
Consider how you could bring it back into your life to re-address the balance.
Try the quick exercise below to reflect further.
Credits: The Exhaustion Funnel by Prof Williams and Dr Penman.
Visual by ArtistRemi Rough.
Note down some of the things you do in an average fortnight. Include responsibilities, fun, chores, work, purposeful things, simple pleasures, guilty pleasures etc.
Think about how you’re spending your time. Now look at each activity on your list, in turn, and ask yourself these two questions:
1. Does this activity elevate my mood, give me energy or increase my sense of wellbeing? We call this Nourishing.
2. Does this activity dampen my mood, drain my energy or decrease my sense of wellbeing? We call this depleting or draining.
Write next to each activity whether it’s a N (Nourishing) or D (Depleting or Draining).You might want to note some things down as both, which is an interesting area of reflection.
Review your list with Ns and Ds and ask yourself:
How can I create more space for nourishment and minimise and manage the things that drain me?
What can I do more or less of?
What can I change or accept?
What can I ask for help with or delegate?
What one thing can I do in the next 24hrs to increase my feeling of nourishment and wellbeing?
Write down your answers.
You can come back to this exercise, you don’t have to crack it all in one go. And it will change and evolve over time, as you do.
The M-Plan is a holistic approach to wellbeing and self-care. It puts you at the centre (notice if this idea makes you feel uncomfortable, that's okay, don't scroll on just yet). There's a valid reason for putting yourself in the centre. Beause, when we look after our needs we can better support others and live life to the full.
We can all play into the habit of being a little bit asleep to ourselves or at times deny ourselves the things that we need. The M Plan helps to remind us of the different ways we can maintain our wellbeing. We invite you to use it for inspiration rather than as another 'to-do list'.
MOVE- getting our bodies moving benefits our physical, mental and emotional health. It could be as simple as walking the dog, stretching, dancing round the kitchen. Anything that gets your heart beating a little faster.
MEDITATE - Meditation and mindfulness are recovery for the mind. You can't do it wrong, it's just about creating space to stop and be present with yourself in this moment. Here are some free meditation apps you might like to check out.
MAKE - we have an innate need as humans to use our hands to 'make'. The act of making can feed our sense of mastery, help us to be mindful and bring us pleasure. If you allowed yourself the time to 'make' with the intention of nourishing yourself or being playful what would you do? For inspiration check out the Tate's workshops & courses.
MEET- we have an in-built need to belong. Connecting positively with others feeds this basic need and can elevate our mood. Balance is required in this area, especially for introverts, for whom too much social contact can be depleting.
MEANING - we all need a sense of meaning, to feel like we are making a positive difference in the world. It can be found through your work, at home or in your community. It could be a small action like checking in on a neighbour or a bigger one like campaigning for a cause. What's your purpose, calling, passion, interest?
MINDSET - our mindset is made up of our beliefs, perspective on life and the way that we talk to others and ourselves about situations. Our minds and therefore our mindsets are more adaptable that we realise and we can nurture them in more beneficial directions.
Make the M plan work for you - play with and adapt it; ensure the activities really nourish you.
If you've found the ideas and frameworks here helpful you can find more in our book 'Own Your Awkward: how to have better and braver conversations about our mental health'. Available to buy here.
For our guide to talking about mental health click below.